Blog

Caring for Mom

The internet is full of good websites that discuss common issues that present themselves when caring for an aging family member, things such as the early stages of dementia, illnesses, hip fractures, insurance, food and how to get paid as a family caregiver.

Housing is not the issue until something happens

Stories abound in their similarity and their variety.  It’s common that plans are seldom made until the situation is suddenly worse due to unexpected illness or accident.  My brother and I were unaware of mom’s frailty until we found plates with leftover food in the cabinet of clean dishes.  She was plagued by mini-strokes that didn’t reveal themselves to us at first but suddenly we had to face questions of where and how to care for her.  We both lived far away but my brother being within a day’s drive did the heavy lifting.  I may finish this story later, it illustrates the issues so well for me.  Mom had little money and no insurance for long term care. Neither of us had the space to bring her into either of our homes and so we sought institutions that we could afford and were pleasing to her.

The time for planning is now

Families need to recognize that old two or three story houses with stairs all over will not be safe for an aging family member.   There are issues of cost that need to be addressed along with safety and quality of life.  Will a new or renovated home that is safer and affordable make your loved one happy?  Assisted living will drain a family’s finances at the rate of $50,000 per year or more.  A few years of living in a new safer environment with family members will conserve finances until there is no other choice.